You ever have those nights where you just can’t fall asleep because you can’t stop thinking?
This is what it’s like for me every single night. It’s both a blessing and a curse.
I’m sitting here listening to Bob Dylan and Beatles songs and I just can’t even fathom how unbelievable my life is. The opportunities embracing entrepreneurship has brought me. I can’t believe what has happened.
You wouldn’t believe how emotional I am as I write this post. You can already tell it’s not one of my normal pieces. But really, I have no idea if I want to laugh, cry, or faint right now. I invite you to join me on this emotional roller coaster as I reflect on how starting my first blog all those years ago changed things beyond my wildest imagination.
Come Gather ‘Round People Wherever You Roam…
Before I continue I want to share with you something amazing that just happened only a few moments ago.
If you visit here often, you know Jordan. She’s probably the most important person in my life, and I love her like she is my own daughter.
Anyhow, I was holding her in my arms and rubbing her back and we were talking about our lives and our futures, talking about the places we’ll go and the things we’ll do. Then I said, “hey can I ask you a question?”
And she nodded her head. I said do you believe in God? And she nodded her head again. Then I said I do too, do you know why? She shook her head. Then I said “I know God is real because I’ve only ever asked him for two things. I asked him for there to be a way to move up here after you visited all those years ago and we had so much fun.
Then when I was gone and I wasn’t able to see you for a few months I asked him to bring me back to you, and now we are here. That is why I believe in God.”
Then she cuddled up closer to me and I said “That is why I like to think of you as my gift from God. Because both times I asked for you and both times he gave you back to me.”
Shortly after I said that, I noticed she had fallen asleep in my arms.
I immediately realized that I just experienced one of the most precious moments of my life.Â
…And now I’m here blogging about it. And she is still laying right here next to me.
Why is this important? Because it goes against everything I ever thought about how I’d turn out.
How Did This Happen?
I wish you could’ve seen how different I was when I was 13 years old. It’s amazing to think that it really wasn’t long ago.
The truth is, I was the last person you would’ve expected to become ‘successful.’
When I was 13, you could’ve found a picture of me next to ‘loser’ in the dictionary. I spent 8 hours a day playing MMO games on my computer. I was overweight. Nerdy. Had few friends. People used to comment on how annoying I was. I was not necessarily bullied, but nobody really liked me.
I was failing classes. Not because I couldn’t do the work, but because I didn’t care to try. I went in and out of depression. I was about to attempt suicide and was fortunately stopped by my parents moments before it happened.
I think back to this period of my life and it just blows my mind. 6 short years later and I own 3 companies, I’ve sold millions of dollars of product, and most importantly, I have someone so important to me that I am motivated to unbelievable levels to continue achieving success.
But I still can’t figure out how this happened. I started blogging for business at 14. I don’t know how things took off. It all happened too fast for me to process it. Don’t get me wrong, it took years. But the idea that 5 years later I’d be making a full-time living online, connecting with more than 1000 new people each day through all my various web ventures, and sharing this special bond with a child is just unfathomable.
I really don’t think I’m all that special, just insanely different. And honestly, it scares me sometimes. I used to occasionally wish I would wake up from this dream and things would be normal. But then as I look over at Jordan sleeping right next to me, I shed a tear and realize that I wouldn’t trade this for the world. Never in my life have I felt such pure happiness and contentment overall. I wish I could put into human words what I have felt this past year in particular. I’d like to think we will all experience it at some point in our lives.
All I know is that if I had never decided to jump head first into entrepreneurship, my life would be completely different. I would be working some sort of traditional job, forced to go somewhere I don’t want to go each day. I would not have had the opportunity to connect with and take in Jordan. And not that it matters, but I’d still probably be a loser in the minds of my local community.
I did not go into this expecting things to turn out this way. I would’ve been happy living an ‘average’ life so long as I could’ve worked from home. Relative to other people in my age group, I feel disconnected. Â I just can’t relate to anything else going on, and it’s very strange.
My friends spent today working, then going home and relaxing.
I spent the day watching The Lion King 4 times… singing and dancing to all the songs. Running around the house. Letting Jordan give me a face mask… whatever the heck that is. Now that she’s asleep, I’m ‘working.’
According to my Facebook news feed, my friends worried today about whether or not they should drink or go to bed early, whether they should watch this show or that show, whether they should go shopping or pay bills first.
Today I worried about how I’m going to scale one of my other companies and how I can help provide the best possible life for Jordan. Right now I’m worried that she’s going to wake up scared or confused as she often does. Big difference.
We Do This To Ourselves
Why did things change? How do we become so different than everyone else?
It’s easy. We do things other people don’t do.
Starting a business is huge, and succeeding with it is even bigger. You have to make tremendous sacrifices. You no longer have time to worry about silly things that ultimately don’t matter. You have to force yourself to adapt without the structure a traditional life provides for you.
I was willing to sacrifice everything I knew, and by doing so, I allowed myself to transform my life in such a monumental way that led it to where it is now.
Obviously, not all of us can throw ourselves 100% into everything. There are aspects of our current lives we can’t give up. But we can do what we can to make changes.
When we throw ourselves into the unknown, anything can happen. This has proven itself to be true with myself and countless other individuals.
But you really have to throw yourself at it and take massive levels of action.
I could’ve grown up, went to college, got a decent job, had kids, and retired at 65.
I threw myself into entrepreneurship and now own 3 companies, will be able to retire whenever I want, and chose to sort of take in a child now.
And I’m so happy.
This Isn’t About Me
Are you happy with your life?
I did not mean to talk so much about myself in this post, but I really do think the changes I’ve gone through personally are drastic enough to illustrate this vital point:
If you are not happy with the current state of your life, you need to take a risk and throw yourself into something that has the potential to change it.Â
This can be a new job, a new partner, a new location, something. Only you know what it is. But I’ll tell you what, if you keep doing what you keep doing, your situation is never going to change.
Only you know what you want. But if you want to live a life other people can’t, you have to be willing to do things other people won’t. If what you’re doing right now isn’t helping you achieve the sort of life you want, than quit wasting your time and start focusing it on where it matters.
And hey, why not start right now by identifying what it is you want and what you’re going to do to go get it. Take a moment to leave a comment and share this moment with us.
This can be the beginning of a new chapter if you allow it to be!
Hello James,
I’m glad you are happy and doing well. I hope this year will be better for you than last year.
I believe in God also. KJV Acts 2:38 and Romans 10:9.
Thanks for sharing.
James Savage(Quote)
Hey James! Long time no see, how you been man?
If I can top last year, it will be unbelievable. I do believe I experienced both the greatest and worst experiences of my life last year. It was incredibly interesting to say the least. But hey, the business growth was great and here’s hoping we both can continue it this year!
James McAllister(Quote)
James, the above was an awesome advice and the brilliant story of yours…
Honestly, I really love to listen to those story…, I hope you will got something new to share me again..
It was really great that you could find out yourself and enjoy your success now, congrats for that….
You said, now I just know what I want but I didn’t configure out what I’ve got to do to achieve my success.
I’ve blogging for several years ago, but it’s almost the fucking work for me…
Sometime I quite blogging and sometime I back and continue it. I don’t what I was doing, but I just want to blog and I couldn’t give that up…
I believe that blogging will change my life, but it isn’t. I’m not sure, I should continue or I need to quit that forever…
Please give me sometime to answer that…
thanks..
Kimsea Sok(Quote)
Hey Kimsea! Been a while since we’ve last talked, so glad to hear from you again.
I’m so glad you liked the story. This piece was really interesting to write because I sort of wrote things out as the emotions flowed and put exactly what I was feeling at that time into the article. I tend to write articles a bit in advance so this one was really unique to me.
If it helps any, it took me several years before I got anywhere with blogging also. Lots of projects that ultimately ended up failing, lots of trial and error, lots of hardships. I only got through because I continued learning and pushing through. And if I hadn’t, well, I have no idea where my life would be right now. Certainly I wouldn’t be as happy with my situation as I am now however.
Doing anything big always has the potential to change our lives in some way. Depending on the size of the action and its results, this can be something small or it can be monumental as blogging has been for me. It’s not easy, but it’s what’s necessary to transform your life.
Glad to see you again Kimsea and I look forward to talking with you again soon!
James McAllister(Quote)
Hey James,
You already have 3 companies! Wow, how do you handle it all my friend. Most people can barely keep up with seeing one become successful let alone 3. I applaud you James for diving in and taking it all on.
I really appreciated you sharing this with us and Jordan must be some kind of special young lady. I know she’s blessed to have you in her life too and it’s obvious to me that you feel the same.
I’m so happy for you though, that life has steered you in this direction and I’m glad that you’re able to tell others that they too can make this happen if they have the desire and the drive.
Appreciate you sharing this with us James and keep up the excellent work.
~Adrienne
Adrienne(Quote)
Hey Adrienne!
I’ve been fortunate enough to streamline the other two companies fairly well so most of my work is management. This has allowed me to focus 90% of my time on this one. I never think it’s a good idea to spread ourselves too thin but the way I’ve set things up have made it possible to have a lot going at once. I love it this way.
I could talk all day and night about Jordan. Honestly I never thought I’d want kids but I guess I just wasn’t mature enough to know how I’d really feel, I know there are a lot of things I still do not know as well. Funny how things change – she is far more important to me than anything. The businesses, the money, everything. I’d give it all up for her in a heartbeat. Fortunately this path I’ve gone down has allowed me to be there for her, and I’m working so much harder, I’m so much more driven knowing that the work I’m doing is going to help me give her the best life possible. She hasn’t had it easy growing up where she was before so I am glad to accept responsibility now and make things better. By far my most important and most fulfilling work will be taking care of her.
I don’t believe success is a zero-sum game and I would love to see everyone here living the sort of life that makes them happy. I do think it is possible for any of us so long as we are willing to make the sacrifices necessary to attain it.
Glad you’ve enjoyed what I’ve shared here Adrienne and I appreciate your kind comments. No doubt Jordan will too!
James McAllister(Quote)
Hey, James,
This piece is truly emotional. Jordan’s response, more touching.
And that you were nerdy at 13? Oooh mee, I love nerds. Only when they have a little bit of humour, you see.
You truly had a sore time growing up but thank God your parents were there just in time to save you from taking your own life.
I almost killed myself once, too. I was frustrated with the course I was studying in college, found out as a freshman i hated mathematics and couldn’t figure what next to do.
Thank God I found myself again in my third year. I found writing and I poured myself into it. It’s been fulfilling ever since.
Trust me, I’ve walked the path of traditional jobs before and I know how frustrating it can be. I would feel depressed as I enter the office, knowing I’m living a lie. Not living the life I truly want to live.
I up and quit. And now, freelancing is paying off. Though it has its challenges, yet it’s fulfilling to resume a job your love every Monday.
You didn’t have to apologize for writing about yourself. Your story is sodding inspiring. And managing three businesses at 19? That’s no mean feat.
This is my strongest takeaway:
“If you are not happy with the current state of your life, you need to take a risk and throw yourself into something that has the potential to change it.”
Well, what I want is to build a blog that adds tremendous value to readers and one that garners me high-paying clients. I’ve thus started a blog to achieve that.
You’re a pretty good writer and I’ll be looking forward to your awesome content in my inbox starting next week, okay?
It’s nice to connect with you. Hope to read more about Jordan soon.
Yusuff Busayo
Yusuff Busayo(Quote)
Hey Yusuff! So nice to see you here.
I have to admit, I was incredibly emotional while writing this. I sort of just threw the thoughts I was having at that time out onto paper and this is what it turned into. I liked the way it turned out though.
Sorry to hear you were also suicidal at one point. I have experienced those sort of feelings a few times throughout my life unfortunately and it’s never easy. I now have something bigger than me though and I know despite how hard things get I could never do something like that. Not only do I need to be here for Jordan but I feel I owe it to the world to help as many people as possible because I am now in a position to do so. These ideas help me push on when I am feeling down.
I really enjoyed hearing your story because you too threw yourself into something huge and it’s now paying off. No doubt that persistence and hard work will pay off for you and I look forward to watching you grow this year.
James McAllister(Quote)
Woah, James! Thanks for the tip. Yes, what’s growth this year without persistence, uhn? The web demands it. And I’m glad you share the feeling.
It was just right to share my story, knowing we sort of have that same background. Let no one tell me doing what you love can’t save you from ever being suicidal? Just my thoughts. But do you second that thought, James? I’d like to know I’m not delirious.
Yusuff Busayo(Quote)
Hey Yusuff, you’re absolutely right. I think the most important thing in life is being happy. No doubt working a job we love is a big part of that. Sadly, so many people focus on the money and not the fulfillment aspect.
Entrepreneurship lets us knock out two birds with one stone. The income potential is limitless and the work is extremely fulfilling. Not to mention, it allows us the freedom to prioritize what’s most important to us, like spending time with friends or family.
Glad to hear we agree on so much!
James McAllister(Quote)
Hi James,
Such a great story you have here.
But as a life coach, I couldn’t help thinking, as I read your article, how common it is for people to think that a life that sucks is “normal” as opposed to a wonderful life being “exceptional.” But the real truth is that no one was born to have a terrible life, we were all born to thrive. The only problem is that masses and masses of people don’t know that.
Life has to tough, things have to be completed, thus their life does such, as per the most marvelous law of the laws of the universe that we call the law of attraction. It gives you what you ask for.
My life used to suck pretty much too, before I learned why, but now I’m like you, I look around and think of my life everyday, and can’t help but being so grateful for my life. I now live every single day at my own pace, I don’t have to answer to anyone, and I’m surrounded with nature and animals which I love.
You seem to be such a good person, and it was so nice to read about your success.
Happy 2016 to you!
~Sylviane
Sylviane Nuccio(Quote)
Hey Sylviane! Good to talk to you again.
You make a great point. I do not think I am any better than my peers but it is sometimes hard to feel normal when everything I do is so different. I do not see the world the same way my peers do and our lives, our priorities, our desires, they are all so different. I see people doing things that are just unfathomable to me, it just doesn’t make any sense. I try to offer input, suggestions, nobody wants to hear them. And then later they’ll go and tell me how much they look up to me. It’s just confusing.
I have always believed that if you are happy with your life, then you are successful. Ultimately I think that’s all that really matters – how happy YOU are with YOUR life. And regardless of how well off you are in other areas (financial, etc.) if you aren’t happy, then you can’t really consider yourself successful. Just my opinion anyway. I don’t criticize other’s life choices if they’ve resulted in the type of life they want, but when I hear so many people complaining when they have the power to change their situation, it’s frustrating, you know? I want to help people, but it seems like some people just don’t want to be helped.
Sounds like you have also managed to create the lifestyle that makes you happy, and it warms my heart to hear that. I would love nothing more than to help as many people as possible feel how you and I feel about our lives right now.
I appreciate you taking the time to share your insight and your own personal story Sylviane, and I look forward to seeing you over on your site very soon!
James McAllister(Quote)
Hey there James! Such a powerful blog post my friend. On track to be a millionaire by 23..Wowwwww! So proud of you man!
Something that jumped out at me on this blog post is this word: DESIRE! Most people dont have the desire to want to change their circumstances but complain about the situations they are in. They become complacent and rather than change things up and do something different, they continue to wallow in it. Sorry ..but this nags the sh$# out of me….
My lifes mantra is …if you want something that you’ve never had..you MUST do something that you’ve never done. Problem is.. most folks wont do things that they never done.
As always, excellent post James. Cheers and make it a great week my friend.
Kim George(Quote)
Hey Kim! Appreciate your support.
You’re absolutely right and it drives me crazy. I came from nothing and started this business with only $20 so I can’t really stand excuses. I look around and see people blaming their poor situation on everyone else but themselves, and it frustrates me. I can lay things out for people but few people end up going for it, and those that do tend to quit when they realize it’s not easy.
I’ve tried to accept that people just don’t see things the way I do and to just live and let die, but it’s hard. I want to help these people so badly but you find out they really don’t want to be helped. It saddens me.
James McAllister(Quote)
Hi James,
It’s so good to hear that things are working out for you both in your personal and business life.
In both cases, it’s always about total commitment… jumping in in with both feet first.
I like to tell people that to be successful in anything you undertake. you must have no “plan B.” In other words, there’s no turning back half way down the road. There’s no thinking about “if this doesn’t work, then I’ll try that.”
“Backup plans” are just excuses to fail.
Meanwhile, the idea of success is really nothing more than what you’re talking about as being happy with your life. I mean, if success is just an income level or a pink Cadillac, then you’ve got the wrong idea of what success really is to begin with.
It’s important that people know what’s really important to them, and go after that without looking back. Then, even if you “fail” to get what you’re after… your happiness derives from the fact that you are responding to your calling.
I love your story, and I love that you’ve gone after what’s important to your happiness, and are actually putting the pieces together to make it work.
Kudos, my friend.
Enjoy your happiness, and don’t stop inspiring others to seek theirs.
-Donna
Donna Merrill(Quote)
Hi Donna!
Things are starting to look up but there is still a lot of confusion and strange things going on. I am confident that one way or another, I will make things right in the coming months.
You make a really interesting point with commitment and backup plans, I had to stop and ponder that for a moment. I know you’re right – I do not need backup plans when I have control over the situation because I know I can complete the task at hand. On the other side, when I do not have control or certainty I go to the other extreme and try to make as many as possible to bring myself as close to certainty as possible.
I am far more confident in my ability to make $100 million than I am to say, fix all the family issues that are going on in my personal life, or have children of my own someday. I have complete control over the former, I have none over the latter two. I have spent so many hours coming up with back up plans, alternatives, etc. to try and get the probability of making it happen as close as I possibly can, but I will never have complete control and thus I will never have certainty or comfort in that regard.
As long as you have control, you can attain anything you want… I don’t understand people who give it up.
Thanks for making me think Donna, interesting ideas and I hope you don’t mind if I share them with more people!
James McAllister(Quote)
Hi James
What a great post, and I’m so happy that things have turned round for you and Jordan. Sometimes the best posts ever are the ones written completely from the heart – as this one so obviously is. You’ve accomplished so much – and yet you’ve realized while younger than the vast majority of people, that the most important thing in life is to have a loving relationship with a child. I hope things continue well for you both.
Am I happy with my life? Well I’ve settled for mediocrity really. I’m comfortable enough and want for nothing, but there’s nothing “amazing” there any more. Happiest times for me are when one of my sons comes to visit, so I can understand how you feel about having Jordan there.
My business clients let me feel useful – and of course my Dad looks forward to my calls and visits so I could never do anything revolutionary like upping sticks and moving away.
I’m actually too comfortable to have the need or motivation to change things. Not needing the income takes the pressure off blogging, but makes it more pleasurable.
So – I’m just fine 🙂 Joy
Joy Healey(Quote)
Hi Joy!
I’ve gone through a monumental shift this year in terms of who I am as a person and what I value. It’s almost kind of scary, I realize there’s a lot I don’t know yet and I’m eager to learn and eager to find out how I’m going to continue to change. If all of the family issues could settle, than I’d finally be at a point where I have everything I want, which is strange because I’ve never really felt that way before.
Joy, I think a happy life is an exceptional life. That’s what matters most in my opinion. Lasting happiness. Something can only be mediocre if it’s not satisfactory. When I first started getting close to Jordan my business suffered dramatically, I must have only spent 1/3 as much time working as I did previously. But I’ll tell you, I was infinitely happier than I was before, and this is coming from somebody who was already obsessively in love with their work. Forget what other people deem as ‘amazing.’ What matters is what YOU think. And I know for me, chasing Jordan around the yard or having her try and teach me how to dance or other little things like that were far more amazing than making another sale.
Now don’t get me wrong, I find a lot of happiness and fulfillment with what I do in business, but if you are happy where you at than you don’t need to feel bad for not doing more.
Always appreciate you stopping by Joy, you’ve done so much for me throughout all of this and I thank you for it.
James McAllister(Quote)
We all believe in God for different reasons. I do believe in God. And it’s my first visit to your blog and it was an emotional first impression. Your love for the kid and your passions and fears. I enjoyed reading a little bit about your life. I am heading straight away to read more.
Imran Soudagar(Quote)
Hi Imran!
I’m glad this post made an impression on you. I was certainly very emotional while I wrote it and I wasn’t quite sure how people would react to it because it was so personal.
I’ve noticed especially in the last few years that when I care about something, I really throw everything I have into it and commit 100%. But this, this is something different. I love Jordan more than I have ever loved anything or anyone in my life, and she has inspired me to work extraordinarly hard to make myself successful. I could have never imagined my life to have turned out this way, and I am incredibly thankful that it has.
It’s great to connect with you Imran and I look forward to speaking more with you soon!
James McAllister(Quote)
Hi James
I really enjoyed reading your ‘from the heart’ post just now. I like your very beautiful description of what it means to be an entrepreneur. That it gives you the freedom to do those things in your life which are most important – and they usually involve other people – strangely enough!
I am in my 60s – probably older than many of your commenters and I only started seriously online marketing 2 years ago, having finally crushed the idea that internet success is only for young people.
It’s never too late to start changing your life, guys! As you said in your post, “If you are not happy with the current state of your life, you need to take a risk and throw yourself into something that has the potential to change it. ”
I remember waking up one morning with the single though in my head “This is as bad as it will get!” It was a sort of defiant pledge to improve my life. I think I had about $15 in the world and everyone was banging my door…
So important when you can’t sleep at night because your thoughts are screaming – to just get up and work. Don’t ever waste those golden nuggets – they are the first appearance of great ideas…
Thanks for you post James – I’ll be reading more – you are now on my blog list 🙂
Richard
Richard Seaton(Quote)
Hi Richard!
First of all I’d like to say it’s so great to talk with you and I thank you for sharing your story here with us.
I wholeheartedly believe success comes down to what you can produce, not your background, your age, race, gender, so on and so forth. When I was first starting out a lot of people refused to take me seriously because I was so young. I later gave them no other option. You’re absolutely right that anybody from any age can succeed with making money online, and you can be somebody that proves this to people. I commend you for making the jump and going for it. Just doing something that makes you uncomfortable and taking huge levels of action is respectable on its own.
I don’t wish bad on anybody but sometimes it helps me to remember that other people go through hard times as well. Unfortunately most seem to wallow in self pity and expect a solution to magically appear. You and I both know that action is what yields results and these are the type of people I want to surround myself with. It is these people that eventually rebound and find both success and happiness in life.
I recently cut ties with most of my family. I won’t lie, it’s been very hard to accept. But once I was able to realize that these people were not the people I thought they were, I was able to pull lessons, take action, and make the most out of the situation. And like you said, when you’re at the bottom, there’s nowhere to go but up.
Thank you again for taking the time to leave a comment here Richard and I really look forward to speaking with you again!
James McAllister(Quote)
Hi James, thanks for sharing the link to this post with me. Thanks for stopping by my blog and reading my story from hardship to blogging success too. I can totally relate as you well know.
From what I know about you, I just can’t picture the person that you used to be, but you did good man, you changed things around and that’s so inspiring to so many people of the younger generation who are at a loss somewhere in their lives.
Running three companies must take a lot of time and my hat goes off to you for what you’ve already achieved. I can’t wait to see how things pan out for you in the future with your ventures.
I think my greatest fear is falling back into that dark hole that I came out of. I know there’s close to zero chance of that happening right now, but because of that fear, I’m always pushing forward with my business and blogging. It’s almost like the more I succeed, the faster and further I feel as if I’m running away from the darkness.
I wish you all the best and success my friend, thanks for sharing such an amazing story.
Fabrizio Van Marciano(Quote)
Hi Fabrizio! Not sure how I missed your comment here. Could’ve swore I responded to it the day it came in… sorry about that!
Honestly I can relate to that feeling of running away from the fear. I grew up near poverty, and I told myself I would never put my children through that. When I lost Jordan it gave me a huge obsession for control and power. I try not to let it act as my motivation but I do try to harness this fear and use it to push myself forward. Every dollar, every new follower, every little bit of influence, I feel it takes me away from the darker times in my life and makes it less likely I’ll go back there.
We can not always control what situations life throws at us but we can put ourselves in a good position to handle things when they come. The good thing about being at the bottom is that there’s nowhere to go but up. I am certain things will only continue to get better for both of us, and in the event of a setback, we’ll now be better equipped to handle it.
I really enjoyed reading your own story because going from hardship to success is always incredibly inspiring.
Thank you Fabrizio !
James McAllister(Quote)
Thanks for sharing. Fun to read your more serious blogging success related pieces and then move into something about your personal life. Cheers and good luck with everything. I’ll keep an eye on the blog.
David(Quote)